This piece of cloth is a kind of satin,
but unfortunately it did not take much color :-(
Something geometry~
(Box-bag is like a picnic box something like that lah... I made it saje-saje since I recalled Alex Yap having one- he is a fashion designer graduated from Malaysian Institute of Art, and I always thought that we could have been classmates if I were to accept MIA's offer back in 2008. WAKE UP!!! YOUR ASS IS IN UKM NOW!!!)
Instead of dreading and getting more angry, I went for lunch at the kitchen.
(Right now at 2:15pm, my father is now cooking fish mee for himself after his lunch at 12pm... FYI, he looks exactly like a pregnant woman- not that he has a fat face or flabby arms, but his tummy is just... huge... sort of like a hungry ghost... Oh Lord, talking about hungry ghost festival... I cannot stand so I just watched him working his clumsy way in the kitchen- imagine kids playing masak-masak with the fire... damned dangerous~ )
The menu was not much of my fancies but I did not complain because I know my mom has done her best. Being able to eat something prepared by mom is more than enough :-) And it also reflected how her gay son appeared extremely useless in the kitchen- cooking has not made it into my hobby list, YET.
It was not too late to get back the supposedly planned serenity on Sunday, so I ate slowly while enjoying the mini jungle behind the house.
Does it look like jungle to you?!
Sometimes we can see biawak crawling around there~
STOP!!!!! Focus SKP! Focus!!! Sunday serenity! Sunday serenity!
Father... so okay... ONLY think about father then... but still... make it slow~
Since the tauke-so at the fashion house forced her filial ideology into my brain, I thought I should add-in one more thing into Sunday serenity- talk to my father.
My father has been living aimlessly after his retirement from his work as a tukang-kayu. He spent his day watching every Chinese News report without really knowing what are being reported, smoking, and sitting looking outside the house. What the fuck is wrong with him!!!
Yesterday, tauke-so told me that I should understand my parents, because everyone only has a biological father and a biological mother. Never expect them to understand us because they may have more than 1 kid. (Mom, sorry for expecting u to understand my bird brain~ I know you are trying yr best, thanks~ I love u)
Seriously I have failed understand my father for I dun really understand myself either and so face-to-face talk would be easier, I guess.
Actually we had this son-to-father (instead of father-to-son, I was the person who initiated the talk) talk before this, and the answer I got was he doesn't know what to do, just wait to die. (How could an adult tell such things to his son?!!!)
I can only concluded, he has no life mission- he has lead a life according to the mundane life syllabus: work-marry-baby-raise baby-work-retire-die.
And this very thought induced another idea: life mission is extremely crucial to keep people alive! (And I wondered why some souls still linger around mortal realm? May be because they die without completing their life mission, which is too important to them?)
Looking back at myself, I have been doing this and doing that. For what? Do I have a life mission?
I took some time to ponder and I think I have too much hidden inside my bird brain, but what seems fancy at the moment are (yeah, more than one, plural form!)
1. Find my soul mate :-)
2. Continue with my fashion fantasy, even though I do not manage to make it to international.
3. Visit Japan again, this time with my family.
4. Really CLUB in a gay club, haha~
5. Grad from UKM and get a great job!
I guess there is only one life mission: to live life without regrets! And this life mission is made of many many mini missions, which 5 are already shown above, and there are many more to come in the future, if I do not die young. Haha.
I need to talk to my father fast for I need to help my mom to close her stall in a while!
Have u ever thought of your life missions? Gambateh! U, me and everyone! Especially Mr straight ;-) I miss u!
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